So my friend and I have been going thru the book Captivating. I was planning on writing about it as I read the chapters, but I feel like I've barely had time to sleep, let alone blog what I've been reading. The book I've been reading (Captivating) has been eye opening. The last 2 chapters I read talked about the wounds that women have. The author says that all women have wounds and that we learn about femininity from our parents - how they treat each other and how they treat us.
So I took a few moments to think about What are my wounds? How do I hide my femininity?
I learned that my mom held down the fort while dad made the money. That Dad loved us and mom. We all liked to play together and did so on weekends. I thought my sister was more loved but I wasn’t abandoned. It hurt that Dad wasn’t around BUT I’m pretty sure I always understood. We got to talk to him while he was at work
Even in high school Dad was around for all my events or atleast a lot of them. But then I was gone – working/volunteering and beginning to make my mark in the world. My mom was the authority figure and so we argued a lot. She worked and made dinner and the rules, but dad usually backed her. My Dad’s emotional absence may be a wound but he made it obvious that he cared for us. I guess my wounds stem from my dad not physically being present and maybe not having him to talk to as often as I’d like. And since I always argued with my mom, I felt/feel like I needed to turn to men. And my Dad’s over protectiveness has made me feel incapable/inferior and resulted in rebellion.
Somehow, I felt this overwhelming sensation that I needed to be a “man” in the house and hide my emotions.
But then I began to wonder: Can it really be that simple? Does it really matter?
What needs to happen now??
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